Posts Tagged ‘relationships’

god and other unacceptable topics

In Communication, Health and Wellness, Home, News and Politics, Relationships, Science on March 10, 2011 at 11:46 pm

For the people who thought they knew what tonight’s post was about: Sorry. That’s for another day.

Religion is one of those things, along with sex, politics, and poop, that you aren’t supposed to talk about in mixed company. As you may guess, I enjoy talking about things that should not be discussed in mixed company.

My personal take on religion is that, like relationships, it’s a personal thing that is no one else’s business. In other words, I don’t give a shit what you think, and what I think is not your concern.

Still. Sometimes I feel like there is a dichotomy that religion boils down to, and it’s whether there is an omnimpotent being. God-ish, you may say.

I’m willing to admit that I’m in the fold of belief in God-ish. And I hesitate to narrow it further, as my beliefs are varied and broad and as far as I’m concerned, not mutually exclusive nor any of your business. What events result in that faith are pretty simple.

When I’m at the end of my rope, there’s a knot. I know that is totally 5th grade book fair poster involving a kitten philosophy. But it’s true. Yesterday was mad shitty. I mean, mad shitty. Think about the shittiest day, dial back someone dying, and that was my Wednesday. It really fucked up the whole week. I figured that life as Wednesday was barely worth it.

Then today happened. And it wasn’t perfect. There was still no sun. But I got a surprise gift from someone who thinks about me when I’m not around, which, let’s face it, is a pretty awesome compliment. Then a bit of good company sandwiched between the next slice of awesome: a childhood career dream come true. To settle the day, good conversation with good friends and a cuddle with my dog.

I suppose it could be a coincidence that a horrible day was followed by a day full of steady pick-me-ups. But it’s happened far too often to make me think that it’s not statistically significant. There’s too many times where I get to learn my lesson, but then get my scrapes bandaged and my lollipop received to think that someone isn’t looking out for me. Whether it’s the soul of my grandmother, a God, or magnetic energy from the sun in the form of Tom Cruise, I can’t help but feel like I’m not alone. Which is nice.

a real lifetime movie

In Communication, Entertainment and Nightlife, Relationships on December 21, 2010 at 11:21 am

I’m not much of a movie person.  I realize that this puts me in the minority, but I’m just far too restless.  I also don’t like getting all worked up and emotional about people who don’t actually exist.  Worrying about whether Jennifer Aniston and her mildly gay co-star will be able to work it out just seems really silly.  I don’t even care if Jennifer Aniston and her real-life mildly gay boyfriends work it out.
I do love to watch human interaction though.  I just prefer the real-life variety.  Instead of going to watch a movie, I’ll go to a crowded bar and sit in a corner and observe.  Watching real people do the dance of interpersonal attraction is infinitely more interesting than watching actors do it.  The power dynamics, the intimacy transactions, and what happens at the end of the night?  Now that’s cinema.
I have an MA in Communication, and even though I no longer am an active Communication scholar, I still do studies all the time.  If being able to tell how people feel about each other ever becomes a marketable skill, I’m going to be a very successful woman. I know when someone loves someone.  I know when someone wants to have sex with someone.  I know when someone is repulsed.  There are stories all around us.  Why pay $10 to watch one on a screen?

all you need is love

In Communication, Home, Relationships on December 3, 2010 at 10:02 pm

It has come to my attention that my previous post appears to paint a dismal picture of relationships.

I don’t think it’s bleak… but maybe that’s because I’m an optimist.  Like, love still happens.  What makes love amazing and awesome is that it overcomes all those natural urges.  Like we are fighting our own biological nature.  Compromise is a beautiful thing.

I don’t want to imply that relationships are something to be cynical about.  I’m really not cynical at all, and the reason I’m not cynical is that I don’t see malice in people’s behavior; it’s just human nature.  But I’m super optimistic about people and relationships and love.  I think people are amazing.

I hate to say that I saw good advice in Glamour magazine.  but I did.  It said make a list of everything you want in a potential mate.  When you meet someone who makes you not care about the list, you’ve got your winner.

The point being- love is what makes all of the bullshit about women treating men as a strategy game and men treating women like sex objects go down the drain, because they can’t stand up to love.  There is a magical thing about a relationship where two people are in it to win it.  Maybe they aren’t soul mates, and maybe they won’t be together forever, but for the time being, it’s them against the world.

I believe in love.  I even believe in marriage (although it’s not for everyone, I imagine).  As much as I see myself as more trouble than I’m worth, it’s never crossed my mind that there isn’t someone out there who is all about putting up with my shit for the long haul.

But please, no heart-shaped jewelry.  I have my limits.

don’t hate the player; hate the game

In Communication, Entertainment and Nightlife, Food and Spirits, Health and Wellness, Relationships, Technology on December 2, 2010 at 12:06 am

Men get a lot of flack for treating women like objects.  Which they do.  But women treat men like objects too.  Just not a sexual object.  Honestly, we have to keep our minds OFF of you if we want to have sex.  You’re a hairy ape, okay?  But I digress.

Women treat men more like game pieces.  To women, every man is just a game of Jenga, where we push and pull and see what comes loose until you’re completely destroyed.

Louis CK first brought this to my attention where he pointed out that men are always destroying things.  Whether it’s a toddler knocking over someone’s Legos or grown men at war, men think anything less than annihilation is acceptable.

Women, while still set on creating havoc, have a different method and target.  Women, and I am including myself in this statement, crush men’s souls by nature.  As prone as a man is to spread his seed amongst the womenfolk, women are set to trap one of those men and make him ours.  We have to make you fall in love with us on the off chance we need protection.  You are our bodyguards, and we are Britney Spears.  You are the Secret Service, and we are the president.  Woman = baby-maker, man = guard dog.  It’s elemental, but I don’t think men or women realize it.

I don’t think it’s out of malice that women are destroying men’s souls.  Just like men aren’t thinking of women as sexual objects not because they don’t have respect for them, but because sex is their favorite thing.  Women need to be loved, and if you can’t do it on your own, we’ll help you.

I’m not saying women are bad for destroying souls or men are bad for wanting to fuck everything.  But I don’t get so worked up about relationships when I remind myself of this fact.