As much as I’d hate to admit it, Donald Trump has a point.

Stick with me on this one.

In an episode of The Apprentice (I have no idea when the episode aired; I read about it), when asked about his lackluster performance in a challenge, the candidate said he wasn’t an experienced salesman.  The Donald replied that everyone should be an experienced sales[person], because we are constantly selling ourselves.

I’m not going to dye my hair orange and comb it over my forehead, but I agree with the Donald.  We are constantly selling ourselves- as a potential employee, friend, mate, or friend-with-benefits.  When I was a professor, I considered my lectures to be my product.  It was my job to sell my students on it- i.e., get them to pay attention and give a shit.  The responsibility was mine.  I had to figure out my target demographic and how to get them to buy.

Dating is the same way.  You don’t lead with your weakness.  You do your hair, you dress up nice, you try to keep the stink to a minimum.  You mention all of the things about you that are awesome and not your lack of employment, criminal record, or irritable bowel.

I hate to think of myself as a product (I’m complicated, damn it!), but when we get down to it, we’re all just turds that need to be shined enough to sell.

For all potential suitors, I am employed and have no criminal record.  And, um… yeah.  That’s it.